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By Toby Moore

For Capital Region Independent Media

Life doesn’t always give us the outcomes we hope for. In those moments, it’s easy to let your emotions take control. But as history shows us, cooler heads prevail. Let these stories remind you of the power of keeping your composure, even in the most trying times.

Alexander Hamilton was a brilliant statesman and one of America’s Founding Fathers, but he had a knack for making enemies. His sharp tongue and political writings made him no stranger to conflict, and one of his fiercest foes was Aaron Burr.

When Hamilton’s private remarks about Burr being “despicable” were published, Burr demanded satisfaction through a duel. Instead of defusing the situation, Hamilton, bound by honor and societal expectations, reluctantly agreed to face Burr on the dueling grounds.

The duel, which took place in 1804, ended with Hamilton fatally shot. Burr, though victorious in the duel, saw his political career spiral into ruin due to public outrage. Hamilton’s decision to defend his honor cost him everything, while Burr’s inability to let go of his anger ensured his own downfall. Sometimes swallowing your pride is better than risking everything to defend it.

“When anger rises, think of the consequences.” ~ Confucius

But pride isn’t the only emotion that can cloud judgment—despair can be just as destructive.

Cleopatra, Queen of Egypt, was known for her intelligence and cunning, but her love for Mark Antony led her to make a devastating mistake.

After Antony’s forces were defeated at the Battle of Actium, he received false news that Cleopatra had died. Overcome with despair, Antony took his own life. Cleopatra, stricken with grief and unwilling to be paraded as a trophy in Rome, ended her life soon after.

Her death marked the end of Egypt’s independence, as the kingdom was annexed by Rome under Octavian.

While Cleopatra’s love and despair were deeply human, her fate also underscores the political stakes of her choices. Despair, unchecked, can lead even the most powerful to their knees.

“Do not let your emotions overpower your intelligence.” ~ Marcus Aurelius

Confidence is a valuable trait, but unchecked arrogance can lead to ruin.

General George Armstrong Custer, who famously led the 7th Cavalry, was known for his boldness but also for his tendency to overestimate his abilities.

In 1876, tasked with confronting a coalition of Sioux and Cheyenne warriors led by Sitting Bull, Custer dismissed advice to exercise caution. Underestimating the size and coordination of the Native forces, he divided his already small command and advanced with only 200 men. Outnumbered nearly 10 to 1, Custer and his men were overwhelmed at the Battle of the Little Bighorn, known as “Custer’s Last Stand.”

Had Custer listened to his subordinates and taken the time to assess the situation, the outcome might have been different. His arrogance turned a preventable defeat into a tragic cautionary tale of hubris.

He reportedly said, “There are not enough Indians in the world to defeat the Seventh Cavalry”—a chilling testament to his overconfidence.

Anne Boleyn, King Henry VIII’s second wife, was known for her intelligence and charm, but her fiery nature often made her enemies.

After rising to power and captivating Henry, Anne’s outspoken nature and unwillingness to defer to him created tension in their marriage. When she failed to produce a male heir, Henry’s affections turned to Jane Seymour, and Anne’s enemies at court seized the opportunity to act against her.

Charged with adultery, treason, and even witchcraft, Anne was arrested and executed in 1536.

Historians agree the charges were fabricated, but her sharp tongue and ambition made her an easy target in a court where enemies were always watching.

Her story shows that unchecked emotions, no matter how justified, can erode even the strongest positions. Tempered words and actions often yield far greater power than fiery outbursts.

“If you can’t control your temper, how can you hope to control your fate?” ~ Anonymous

Each of these stories—from Hamilton’s pride to Cleopatra’s despair, Custer’s arrogance, and Anne Boleyn’s fiery temper—reminds us that emotions can be powerful, but unchecked, they’re destructive.

Losing your cool doesn’t just impact the moment—it can change the course of your life.

Cooler heads prevail because they see the bigger picture, weigh the consequences, and act with clarity instead of impulse.

Staying in control isn’t about suppressing emotions—it’s about mastering them.

Toby Moore is a columnist, the star of Emmy-nominated “A Separate Peace,” and the CEO of Cubestream Inc.