Whittling Away: Mirrors don’t lie

In Columns, Columns - Greenville, The Greenville Pioneer
February 1, 2022
0
Share

By Dick Brooks

For Capital Region Independent Media 

Headshot of a man named Dick Brooks.

I was passing a full length mirror the other day and made the mistake of looking at it.

Lengthwise, I fit just fine, it just wasn’t wide enough. Never having known a mirror that lied, I think it’s time to shed a few pounds.

I’ve been considering it for some time now, there are hints and signs that have helped me come to this conclusion. Since the majority of mature Americans are now judged to be overweight, maybe sharing some of my personal observations with you will help some others to resolve to become losers, too.

I’ve noticed that my legs are getting longer — at least it has become harder to reach my feet. In fact, now that I think about it, it’s been a while since I’ve seen my feet.

The number of X’s on the size tags in my shirts is starting to rival the marque of an adult movie theater. I found one of my T-shirts folded and stored in with the tablecloths.

I can now use my belt to measure my height. I no longer have a sideways. My double chin has had children of its own. Actually, it’s not quite that bad, but it is headed in that direction, so I figure I better start now or it may become reality.

I’m really not in bad shape. In fact, round is a very nice shape but I’d like to try for oblong at least. It means getting up earlier and making time for some planned exercise. The only problem I foresee is that my favorite early morning exercise is making breakfast. That could be a conflict of interest.

I think I’ll hit the library and read up on some of the more popular diets. I’ve been on the Dr. Atkins Diet before and liked it, even though the idea of losing weight by eating a whole cow at a sitting while passing up a slice of bread and a helping of beans never quite seemed logical to me.

At the very least, I’ll keep myself entertained for weeks. Have you noticed how many books on diets and proper nutrition are in the library? The only section that’s bigger is the cookbook section. Did you know there are more cookbooks found in the average American home that any other type of book? Maybe I’ve discovered a correlation here between obesity and literacy.  Nah!

Being a person of reasonable intelligence, I think I’ll gather my support group around me, start moving more and eating less and in a few weeks, I’m sure I’ll start getting positive results.

If I don’t, I think I’ll just hang that full-length mirror, the one that started all this, sideways and stand farther back. That should also solve the problem.

Thought for the week — “It’s sad to grow old, but nice to ripen.” — Bridgitte Bardot

Until next week, may you and yours be happy and well.

Dick Brooks can be reached at whittle12124@yahoo.com.

Related Posts
Headshot of a female named Pat Larsen

Aging with Grace: What IF…?

In Health & Wellness, Health & Wellness - Greenville, The Greenville Pioneer
August 14, 2024
0

By Pat Larsen

For Capital Region Independent Media

Headshot of a female named Pat Larsen
Pat Larsen

I’m sure if you follow my columns, you already can hear the rant coming about something or other. Goodness knows, there’s lots of curiosities and downright confusing stuff happening everywhere you look.

If you’re new to my column… welcome!  

I write as a Baby Boomer, for Baby Boomers and seniors living in a world that seems to have moved on and forgotten that we birthed them all.

Yes, there’s good reasons to make this world, four generations strong, more inclusive. 

I want my grandchildren to learn to be considerate and caring to everyone they meet as well as patient and attentive. My expectation is that we all will be treated as well.

What if… everyone remembered to be gracious. Every day.

What if… kids were encouraged to come to the dinner table and put down their devices.

What if… doors were held open for someone with a cane or was obviously struggling with reaching an item on a top shelf in the grocery store who you could help.

What if… you just took a moment to greet someone with a smile, to say “good morning” or hello sincerely.

What if…  the new bathroom signage that isn’t very clear in this world right now, could also contain familiar words to help old geezers know which one they were welcomed to use. Words like, Ladies and Gents, alongside “Self-identified.”

What if… the degree of modesty that we’ve always known as senior ladies and gents were honored regardless of the excuse — “these are the times we live in.” Especially when we venture outside of our homes.

What if… younger kids and older folks were paired together to learn the how-to’s of using new technology. Isn’t that a perfect match, giving each age their dignity to learn from each other?

What if… our schools offered this kind of program and invited seniors in to learn as well. Might make the sting of increasing school budgets less of an issue if everyone was getting more from this education process. Wherever you live, BTW.

What if… we all just stopped grumbling, no matter what our generation, and found that we could be grateful for this wonderful place that we live in and for being in a country that is safe. And still pretty amazing. 

What if… sometime before we take our last breath, we could close our eyes in peace knowing that all was not in vain — the wars, the dial-up phones, the times before Venmo when paying for something was less complicated.

What if… some time and patience was shown to seniors to help with navigating payment options on tablets at check-outs.

What if… there were check-out lines for seniors dedicated to simplifying what used to be so much less complex when making purchases.

What if… there were programs where knowledgeable professionals could teach seniors about how to avoid scammers (I have tried every resource I’m aware of to bring someone in to teach at my Aging with Grace programs regarding this topic and have been repeatedly met with blank stares and unreturned phone calls, yes, even the Department for the Aging in Catskill).

What if… younger generations realized there are much simpler solutions than any AI can define. The old expression is “we know stuff and we do things!” Never more true than for seniors.

What if… you add your own questions to this list. 

There’s still time. Let’s just hope the younger generations don’t then wonder…WHAT IF we had just asked?

Pat Larsen lives, works and plays in Greene County with her husband of 50 years and their pup, Lily. Pat is a syndicated columnist, a fitness instructor, author and recent recipient of the Top Five Changemakers Award in Greene County, curator and director of her program “Aging with Grace…Growing Wise with Age!” which brings informative programs monthly to local venues. Interested in having Pat speak to your group? Let her know. Pat can be reached at 518-275-8686.

Police blotter

In News, News - Greenville, The Greenville Pioneer
February 28, 2025
0

Editor’s note: A charge is not a conviction. All persons listed are innocent until proven guilty in a court of law. Charges can be amended or dismissed.

STATE POLICE

  • Francis VanAlstyne, 54, of Coxsackie, was arrested Feb. 22 at 10:56 p.m. in Coxsackie and charged with fourth-degree grand larceny, a class E felony. VanAlstyne was released on his own recognizance.
  • Shane Mobley, 34, of Elizaville, was arrested Feb. 22 at 10:28 p.m. in Catskill and charged with driving while intoxicated with two previous convictions, a class D felony; aggravated unlicensed operation of a motor vehicle/permanent revocation, a class E felony; and second-degree obstruction of governmental administration and resisting arrest, both class A misdemeanors. Mobley was released to a third party.
  • Lily Marlynn DiPrima, 20, of Schenectady, was arrested Feb. 23 at 2:20 a.m. in Cairo and charged with operating a motor vehicle with a blood-alcohol content over 0.08% and driving while intoxicated, both unclassified misdemeanors. DiPrima’s arrest status was not reported.
  • Jamier Daquon Allen, 24, of Albany, was arrested Feb. 23 at 6:07 p.m. in Catskill and charged with aggravated unlicensed operation of a motor vehicle, a class E felony. Allen was issued an appearance ticket.
  • Gloria Vonli Tucker, 21, of Albany, was arrested Feb. 24 at 2:05 a.m. in Catskill and charged with driving while intoxicated and operating a motor vehicle with a blood-alcohol content over 0.08%, both unclassified misdemeanors. Tucker was issued an appearance ticket.
  • Kayla Marie Bremiller, 28, of Cairo, was arrested Feb. 26 at 10:26 a.m. in Cairo and charged with third-degree criminal mischief/damaging another person’s property, a class E felony. Bremiller was released on her own recognizance.
  • Madden Ashlynne Reilly, 22, of Saugerties, was arrested Feb. 26 at 9:30 p.m. in Catskill and charged with third-degree unlawful fleeing a police officer in a motor vehicle, a class A misdemeanor, and operating a motor vehicle with a blood-alcohol content over 0.08% and driving while intoxicated, both unclassified misdemeanors. Reilly was released to a third party.
  • Lucien Ponzo, 39, of Schenectady, was arrested Feb. 27 at 1:41 a.m. in Catskill and charged with operating a motor vehicle with a blood alcohol content over 0.08%, driving while intoxicated, and third-degree aggravated unlicensed operation of a motor vehicle, all unclassified misdemeanors. Ponzo’s arrest status was not reported.
  • Job Feliciano Cardenas Hernandez, 30, of Tannersville, was arrested Feb. 27 at 10:04 a.m. in Hunter and charged with forcible touching, a class A misdemeanor, and third-degree sexual abuse, a class B misdemeanor. Hernandez was issued cash bail in the amount of $5,000.
  • Matthew Loucks, 34, of Albany, was arrested Feb. 27 at 3:50 p.m. in Coxsackie and charged with criminal purchase/disposal of a weapon-purchaser ineligible and first-degree falsifying business records, both class E felonies. Loucks was issued an appearance ticket.
  • Heidi Byrne, 44, of Medusa, was arrested Feb. 27 at 5:16 p.m. in Greenville and charged with second-degree aggravated harassment, a class A misdemeanor. Byrne’s arrest status was not reported.
  • Heather Haag, 40, of Clinton Corners, was arrested Feb. 27 at 5:44 p.m. in Catskill and charged with four counts of seventh-degree criminal possession of a controlled substance, a class A misdemeanor, and one count of manufacture of drug-related paraphernalia, a class A misdemeanor. Haag was issued an appearance ticket.
  • Jason Fisk, 51, of Athens, was arrested Feb. 27 at 10:15 p.m. in Catskill and charged with driving while intoxicated with a previous conviction and operating a motor vehicle with a blood-alcohol content over 0.08%, both class E felonies. Fisk’s arrest status was not reported.

Ravena News-Herald

The Ravena News-Herald is a weekly newspaper reporting on the news in the Ravena, Coeymans and New Baltimore communities of beautiful upstate New York.

Greenville Pioneer

Greene County’s independent newspaper. Featuring local news, letters to the editor, upcoming events, police blotter, columns from local writers and more.

The Columbia Paper

The Columbia Paper is a weekly newspaper reporting news and events from the communities of Columbia County in beautiful upstate New York.

Copyright © 2025
Capital Region Independent Media.

A product of NYVT Media LLC
TheUpStater.com is powered by CityMediaInc.com